One major reason why things go wrong and people never get the proper correction they need is because we have wrongly defined what the love of God means. We have reduced this to the expression of an emotion where the ultimate goal is how we make people feel that moment.
If a parent makes the momentary feeling of the child her ultimate goal then she will yield to doing what pleases the child at that moment and not what will be helpful to the child in the future. Feed her with what she wants rather than what she needs, this attitude, will hurt and not help. We almost walk on eggshells when relating with one another and do not speak up when we see character defects that will ultimately destroy the person hurting and damaging others along the way.
God knows it is in a small family setting, our circles that our character defects and destructive tendencies show up and he expects we will be shown love by the people he has placed in our lives who should hold us accountable and speak the truth in creative ways to communicate the fault they may have noticed and correct it in secret.
It is the failure of these spiritual cells and families to pray for and correct in secret that allows people to emerge in the public square with major character defects. What we are creating are cells which enable people rather than correct.
God did say he will require the blood of your brother at your hand if you refused to speak to him about the error you saw in him as you both grew in the things of God.
TLB “Don’t hate your brother. Rebuke anyone who sins; don’t let him get away with it, or you will be equally guilty. – Leviticus 19:17
The larger and obvious mistakes we see today in ourselves are not just failures of the individual but the “system” around us in which we developed which was either too weak or intimidated to speak up.
The system may simply have had a misconception of love which was to act nice always and not rock the boat.